Thank you 2009.

Альбом: I'll Follow The Sun

Ok, I've just moved. Let's say I moved here 2 years ago, but I still have no home. Strictly speaking, I have several places I could call home, but no such a place that would be mine.
I'm too nervous. Nervous and ill. This city, my beloved, doesn't love me anymore. I lose everything: I lose most intimate things. I don't know what to do: everything seems to pass away so unexpectedly, so quickly.
Seems as if I had fabricated an illusory world. But it is so sad. I don't know what to do. To dust the traces of the past?
Oh.
Do. Not. Check. Your. Mailbox.
Do. Not. Think. About. The. Future.
You have nothing. Nothing at all.
Not in my line... Not in my line?!

Completely confused.

The winter has come. Don't ask the calendar, don't look in your window, it doesn't matter, 'cause it has come indeed.
I adore the baltic wind, I'm mad about piercing through the distances, I'm happy when in the night I'm going to the city of my spontaneous happiness.

So much happiness for one day. Everything is so healingly simple.
I remember.

The banks of the Daugava - how happy I was when it met me in the night, beautiful, strong, calm, shining.
I'm so happy to look in the eyes, to smile and to be simple.
Just simpler.

recursion?

Yandex has just proposed me to search for "бархатный сезон". He doesn't know probably that nothing can be more "velvet" and warm.
All this sadness is caused by the fact of impotence in front of The Past.
It's just in the past.
And I'm here.
Sooo saaaad.

in a timely manner :)

Gosh, what a wonderful year!
Living is more like an adventure, a long adventure. Still living, still enjoying it.

Light is inside us, the world is made of light. You just should notice it, oh yeah.
Love will tear us apart again?..

Usual is boring, fairy-tales are inside us. They are hand-made.
It's so easy, indeed.

Ever fallen in love with someone?

Believe in you, believe in people.

I do love gifted men. It even seems to be absurd. I've almost forgotten how it feels.

I can't find proper words to express myself.
It's painful (though just a little bit) to watch and to be so dull.
Overwhelming August. Breathtaking.
I'm afraid of losing it.

And Bill Evans and Jim Hall make me so calm and so still. Cool jazz is a sort of meditation, I think.

Haven't been here for ages. Seems to be so unreal.
This July has been great, sure. Love will tear us apart again, lol.
Finnish - Finland - Emperor Paul - Gatchina, I love you.
Still imprudent and a bit crazy. July is hot like a real heart of summer.

Red and white, and green, of course.
The rhythms of Buena Vista Social Club and Manu Chao. Those very eyes. The songs of this summer. Green fields, a taste of icecream, wonderful old ladies of Ingria. Bluebells, yellow flowers, parks, ponds, trees, hills.
Carpe diem.

Miun kanssain.